Have you checked in with yourself?
Ask yourself the question "do I love myself?"
What comes up? Another question... the answer...is it yes or is it no? How fast could you answer this question?
I am a self proclaimed Thought Leader and In my unique way, I would like to help shift the collective mindset.
I think a shift can only happen when we pay attention to our habits.
Habits are behaviours or thought patterns. Thought patterns make up your mindset. Sometimes a shift can occur instantly with a new awareness.
Keep reading. Perhaps it will happen for you today.
When we are very young we mimic and model our environment and learn how to love ourselves by copying how others love us. If those role models love us in a way that is not ideal, abusive or perhaps negligent than we might not actually be able to model it at all. This can cause a lack of awareness that self love IS a needed skill and emotion. My hope is that if you are like I was (at the age of 40), and are just realizing this now as an adult, you can start to create our own self-love. Most people just need the “how”. Many people tend to do this by embarking on a path of self-discovery.
The following is a key mindset pattern and Is a part of my "how to develop self love" program. I teach my life coaching clients this mindset pattern and ask them to read the next paragraph often until it shows up as a new habitual thought pattern within themselves. You can do this too.
- It is important to realize that you do not need to define your worth or yourself by how other’s define you. Their opinion is not yours, it is theirs. Therefore, any negative opinions they might have about you is really a projection of how they feel about themselves (not you), it’s an illusion, so it is important to leave it with them, it belongs to them. In my coaching world this phycholgical phenomenon is referred to as Perception is Projection. A person's perception of their own self deep down outside conscious awareness is projected outward through a camera and lens unique to that person. You are simply the screen that they are projecting on. Take a classic bullying situation. How many times have you heard that bullying behavior is all about the bully, what they feel about themselves ( usually poor self esteem) and this is projected outward onto a target. Of course it is harmful to the target, but perhaps it doesn't have to be. I always remind my son that he can choose to not let hurtful words hurt or he can choose to have them hurt only a little. I teach my karate youth and adult students to consider that they can "decide" to not allow the negative opinions of others land on them at all. This is key to emotional and mental self defense in my opinion.
When you understand that you can decide where to spend your emotional currency and realize that you hold it, not someone else, the seed of self love begins to grow. If you decide that how others see you is actually how you ARE then there is work to be done because this thought pattern is flawed. Worthiness is a birthright and when you get to a place where you understand this truth about yourself AND others you will find yourself loving life, controlling your destiny and you will be released from a huge block which is holding you back from living the life you deserve and being the incredibly magnificent person you already are!*™
~To your Self-Mastery and Wellness!
*™ The thoughts, opinions and photos in this blog article are the intellectual property of Julie Creighton and may be shared in whole through social media in its entirety or in parts with appropriate credit being given to Julie Creighton & juliecreightonnlp.com